where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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