Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
