Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Will exercising make me less horny?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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