yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
