He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
