His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
