Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
