some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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