i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
