i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
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