i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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