Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid