Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
