I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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