its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Why are your pants in the freezer?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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