If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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