what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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