question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
