Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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