i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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