I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Your tits are I can't wait for
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
you traded sex for a burrito?
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I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Randomize