Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize