I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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