We won't sleep together?
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
