I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
