I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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