I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize
