Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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