I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
