I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize