I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
wakey wakey hands off snakey
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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