Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
