I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
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I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
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if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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