I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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