Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
