id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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