Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
