i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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