so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
