Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
you win again, gameday.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
