So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
i dont even know how to be here
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
