carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
