I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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