I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
