this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
A+ Viking dick
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