she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
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I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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