He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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