After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
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