I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
