It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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