Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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