ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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